The Kagoma people live in the southern part of Kaduna state.Kaduna state is located in the North-west region of Nigeria. The Kagoma people are very ceremonious; they celebrate every pleasant event, from birth to death of the old. In addition, they are very religious, peaceful and lively.

Marriage is one of the important ceremonies in Kagoma land. The people are traditionally monogamous, except for a handful that practice polygamy. Three stages are involved in marriage among my people (the Kagomas’).These stages include: the pre-ceremony stage, the introduction and the actual marriage ceremony.

The first step occurs when a man sees a lady of his choice. This is in form of courtship. At this stage, the man expresses his love to the lady. If she concurs, the relationship starts between the two. The Kagoma tradition values courtship. As such, the elders of the land always emphasize the need for adults to observe a period of courtship as it will help them to unravel their strengths and weaknesses and will give them the opportunity to know if they can accommodate the weaknesses they notice about each other before marriage. At this stage, the man is supposed to show a sign of respect and commitment by giving the lady’s family a helping hand on the farm, once in while.

The next stage is the formal introduction. This is very important as it will determine whether the marriage will take place or not. The introduction is done in order to seek the consent of the would-be-spouse’s parents. In this case, the man’s parents are accompanied by two or three trusted friends to meet with the lady’s parents. They carry along with them, three cocks, fifty pieces of kola nut and a keg of palm wine. The man’s parents introduce themselves and their trusted friends. After that, the bride’s parents welcome them formally. The man’s parents declare their intention and express their son’s desire. At this point, if the girl’s parents agree, they will accept the gifts brought by the man’s parents and then fix a date for the actual marriage ceremony collectively. When the date is fixed, the man’s parents will confirm the extent of financial commitment expected from them. The man’s parents will then pay the dowry, an amount of money requested from them by the lady’s parents which must be accompanied by a bag of salt. The salt will be shared among neighbors and well wishers so as to seek for their blessings.

The actual marriage ceremony holds at the village square where all willing villagers gather to rejoice with the bride and the groom. At the village square, the bride and groom are introduced formally to the villagers by the village head. After the introduction, the bride and the groom are invited to the center of the square to dance in order to express their joy. Thereafter, the parents of both the bride and the groom are also invited to dance. This depicts unity between the two families. After dancing, the bride’s parents bless their daughter and formally hands her over to the groom, who receives her with joy along with his parents in the presence of the villagers who traditionally serve as witnesses. At this stage, she leaves her parents to sit very close to the groom and his parents. This automatically shows that she now belongs to a new home and has taken the position of a wife.

A special delicacy of cassava and groundnut soup garnished with varieties of bush meat is served to every villager present. This kind of delicacy is prepared because cassava and groundnut are the major farm produce in Kagoma land, and the Kagoma people are known for their brave hunting expeditions. The delicacy is normally accompanied by palm wine. At this stage, eating is accompanied by intense drumming and singing by the villagers. As soon as the traditional marriage is over, the bride and the groom consummate the marriage.

Marriage is highly respected and valued by my people (the Kagomas’).As a result, any man or woman who has attained the marriage age is expected to get married. People who refuse to get married are considered as weaklings and irresponsible members of the Kagoma ethnic group.

References: BIDALE ONLINE - Create Post

Cassava: Wikipedia online encyclopedia. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cassava

Polygamy in Nigeria; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygamy_in_Nigeria

Economy of Nigeria; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Economy_of_Nigeria